This Is It
by Alleykat29
Summary: Death grows as life goes on. Even with every death, the sun still rises, the stars still twinkle. And eventually, you'll be forgotten, only remembered by those who remember, and they too will be forgotten. (Rated T cause: Death, Possible Gore, Deep, Dark, Death, Depressing, Death)
1. Chapter 1

**Hello! These are just going to be a series of deaths. Yeep. Have fun. I know I will..**

"Wait!" The words hurt my ears like piercing daggers

I felt my paws skid and my eyes grow wide.

This was it.

I felt time speed up, but in a way it all slowed down.

My mother, my mate, and my brother.

They looked down at me.

What a feeling.

I watched the rocky walls narrow.

_It takes a life time to die! _I snickered and ignored how true it really was.

I closed my eyes, I didn't want to remember my Mates horrified face.

So I thought of her when we first met.

Her fur shining in the light of the moon.

Pain struck my side as a twig ripped through my pelt.

I shut my eyes tighter.

This was it.

It was cold.

It was dark.

And my last thought was and always will be

This is it.

**Sorry it's a bit short**


	2. Chapter 2

**XxLightsunxX (Guest): Thank you! I'm glad I please you, small nerdy tween! XD**

**I wonder how many people I have put off by my summary..**

**Here's the next one! Bit longer, bit different. Kinda poetry, but far from it?**

**OH and for best affect, listen to the saddest song you can think of.  
**

Beautiful wasn't it?

The way the petals fell as the wind hit them.

The way the leaves gently floated down to earth.

How the rising sun always set.

How beautiful was the way of gravity.

Magnificent as how it could make each and every splash of water come back down.

Magnificent to the way that the birds always had to land somewheres.

This wasn't beautiful though.

This was death.

My short life was taken by a single fall.

My small lungs filling with water

Water clouded my vision.

Water choked me.

Death rolled over me like the rising current.

Death, like a shot of lightning into your heart.

It took your loved ones.

It took your life.

And the only thing you can do is hope,

And try,

To swim

To live.

But in the moment, all you can think is.

_This is it._

But that's what happens.

**Thanks for readin'!**

**| Kat |**


	3. Chapter 3

**In case (I really doubt it) you didn't catch that, the last one was about a kit who fell into water and drowned. How nice am I?**

**SO I just finished reading The Fault In Our Stars (By John Green ((Duh, how do you not know this ;3))) And 1) Loved it 2) I hate you John (Not really) 3) I think I can justify my lil series of death with TFIOS for some reason..**

**Apparently death is interesting because this story literally got a review in the first few minutes of posting, there's also 3 reviews, and two chapters. I'm not sure if I am happy for this or scared?**

**I'm joking, but thank you guys!**

"What do you mean they're not my kits?" I could feel my voice break as my mate ducked her head.

"I'm sorry" She tried to apologize, she kept murmuring and took a step forward.

I shook my head, avoiding her beautiful eyes.

"You lied to me! How could you?" I drew my lips back in a snarl, how could I love a liar?

"I didn't want to tell you! What was I supposed to say? When I ran away I became pregnant with a rouge? Do you think that I wanted you to know? I love you! And only you! He was an accident!" I recoiled in shock at her words.

"How dare you call ou- that rouges- kits an accident? Your own kits?"

"My kits are not the accident, maybe it was you who was the accident." She mumbled, probably not for me to hear.

"What?" My ears deceived me surely.

"You killed my brother.. I forgave you. I have kits with a rouge and you act like I killed you!" She hissed, the pain of grief still fresh in her mind.

And it was in mine as well.

I remember the

Flattening my ears against my head I pelted off as my heart shattered.

"You're on Shadowclan territory!"

I ignored them and ran, my paws were beginning to feel raw and sore but I kept my pace.

The patrol stopped pursuit as I left their territory into land that was not owned by any.

A sudden weight landed on my back and I felt my paws collarless underneath me.

Sore and weak I couldn't move, but I managed to turn my head.

Bright claws glinted in the sun, I stared with wide eyes as they came down at my neck.

This is it.

I had died like a rouge, killed by one that had been staying near Shadowclan.

It turns out I was wrong, that land held a vicious killer, that killed the killer, so was this justice?

Or was this murder?


	4. Chapter 4

_I've got it this time_

Wiggling my haunches I slightly disturbed the tall grass causing the rabbits ears to prick up.

_1.. 2.. 3!_ Launching myself to the white prey it gave chase.

I struggled to keep up, my unusually short legs for Windclan not fast enough.

I lashed at a claw, hissing as it only caught a shred of fur from the rabbits tail.

I pounced again in attempt to catch it, and felt my claws sink into nothing.

The rabbit sat just inside it's burrow, mocking me!

Growling I dove into the dark tunnel, my sides hitting the walls at every angle.

I hadn't much room to move, and the rabbits smaller size gave it easy access to maneuver.

As the white pelt turned to run I slapped my paws on it's back, feeling the crunch of bones beneath them.

Shuffling forward I nipped it's neck and felt it's heart beat slow.

I realized I couldn't turn around so instead I grabbed my kill and shuffled back.

My haunches struck a side of the tunnel and I cursed under my breath feeling the loose dirt fall into my eyes.

Blinking the soil out of my eyes I tried to scoot back my heart rate slightly quickening.

The air was stuffy and whenever I let out a breath it stirred the dirt underneath, my pelt must have been disgusting, knowing how the rabbit's white fur had been splotched with dark mud.

I tried to look beside me, under me, over me, anything, but I couldn't turn enough to see, and the darkness was not helping my eyes.

The silence became deafening, the only sound was of the dirt being stirred, the blood rushing in my ears, my heartbeat that could've been heard from camp, and my own breathing, little sounds, panicky sounds.

I debated whether or not I should try and dig at the side at the tunnels, but they seemed too unsteady.

Maybe if I just kept walking I'd get out.

I felt my rear hit a solid surface and my breath began to hitch.

The tunnel must of closed when I hit the sides!

Panicking I began to run, as fast as you can when your paws are practically against your chest at all times.

I ran and ran, I turned right at every turn in hopes they'd be the right choice.

I stopped and began panting, my lungs screaming for air.

My heart-wrenched as I realized that I couldn't get out.

I knew one way or another I was going to die.

The sides here weren't quite as unsteady, I could turn around!

I began clawing the sides and turned feeling still incredibly cramped, muscles aching.

I began to run, thanking Starclan that I had only turned right, that just meant this time I always turned left!

My paws felt raw once I stopped, my claws littered with dirt, my nose, mouth, and ears filled with the rotten soil.

I smelt a faint scent of blood, meat, was this where I had been before?

I tried to sniff for the dead rabbit, my scents completely filled with dirt, but yes there was rabbit!

Placing my nose to the ground I found the rabbit just ahead.

Beginning to chow down I felt my empty stomach be filled, what a relief.

If I do die, I'll die full.

Returning to the dead end I began to inspect it, looking for a weak spot I could easily escape from.

Purring I found one, I'd finally get out of this death trap!

I felt my entire body warm at the thought and the feeling of freedom so close made my swipes strong, made them quick.

Sitting down to rest I felt the tunnel shake.

_No! _

Dirt began to fall heavily, I heard paw steps just above me, a patrol.

I wailed out in agony, causing the vibration of my yowl to shake loose dirt.

They were just above me, and suddenly I felt a sickening thud hit me.

A chunk of dirt crashed onto my back opening the tunnel.

Everything ached, but the fresh air seemed to give me pitiful hope.

I cried out weakly and an apprentice saw me.

She started wailing and telling the patrol, I felt dizzy.

"This is it" I mumbled as the group of warriors tried to haul me out.

I was being dragged into camp, and each movement hurt, I wish I'd just die.

Coughing my sides heaved, my futile attempt to clear my throat and lungs of soil had failed in pain.

I can slightly make out the medicine cats worried face, turning into a mournful shake of her head.

She wasn't going to even try?

"There's nothing I can do" She murmured to the clan, practically answering my thoughts.

"His spine has been broken, I'm surprised he's not dead already. He's paralyzed, and the dirt clogging his lungs cannot removed."

"What about yarrow?" Her apprentice cried

She just shook her head "He'd never be able to move."

I felt a sob in the back of my throat and the medicine cat walked to the back of her den, returning with 3 dark red berries.

"You will no longer feel pain. These are deathberries, I suspect you know that, 3 can kill the strongest warrior, so you should feel nothing. If you'd like I can give you poppyseeds to knock you out so that when you die, you die peacefully." Her words hit my heart like daggers, she was trying to help, and she was honest, sympathy flooding her eyes, but my heart told me she was a killer.

I nodded and she went back to the den, and came out with little seeds.

Lapping them up, my already weary eyes closed and I felt darkness consume me, and I tasted the bitter sweet berries being shoved down my throat.

_This is it._

_This is all it'll ever be._

_We are born, we live for nothing in the end, because we always die, and even if someone remembers us, they die._

_We all die._

_What's the point in anything?_

_What's the point of eating if you're just going to get hungry again?_

_What's the point in loving when you're only going to lose them?_

_That small joy?_

_The little contentedness in this dark pathetic world?_

_Maybe._

_But it's not fair that we have to always try to prove ourselves._

_What's it all for?_

_Why do we want land when really it won't matter when we have to move to new territory._

_Nothing is forever, not even the stars._

_Everything ends._

_So why try?_

_I guess some cats just want to be noticed._

_Maybe they are trying to get the world to notice them, to make their life worth it?_

_Maybe we should notice the world a bit more._

**Sorry if I put you in a mental hospital.. Or gave you depression. But this **_**is**_** a series of death, and depression **_**is **_**a side effect of dying. (Actuallllly, it's a lot more complicated then that, cause you see your.. never mind no one wants sciencey talk.****)**

**Thanks for reading!**

**The child scarring writer-**

**-Kat **


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you guys for the nice awesome amazing comments! I was going to work on my other story, but you guys LOVE death so here we go! I noticed how in all reality I am being such a jerk, I torture these cats that you learn about, without giving any names, and then just kill them off as you begin to get to know them.**

**TheCrazyMarshmallowCat: I know, I'm very cruel ;w; Thank you though!**

**Flight of The Snowy Owl: Haha thanks! I enjoy making others suffer? Sorta?**

**Time to torture some kitty cats that probably don't deserve it! Wait..**

**Also! Troye Sivan's (Shamelessly promoting) "Make You Love Me" Fits this chapter perfectly, so go listen to that. Now. Thanks 3 It's like perfect for this.**

"C'mon" The dark toms eyes flickered mischievously as he guided that little she-cat through the forest.

Mentally hissing I shrunk down lower in my hiding spot.

The she-cat, of course, followed _my _mate.

It may not be official, but we were meant to be, he had told me he loved me!

How could he prance around with her and act like nothing was between _us_ then every night he would proclaim his love to me?

_He's a good liar, he has to lie to his clan every day saying that he loves her, but he really loves you. _A little voice in the back of my head kept me positive.

I couldn't watch anymore and I stalked back to my territory.

So what if Shadowclan can't be mates with Thunderclan?

It's such a stupid rule, you can't stop true love!

To not be caught back at camp empty-pawed I succesfully hunted a couple of weak mice.

As I looked down at pathetic creatures I imagined that little-mate-stealer beneath my claws, writhing in pain, soaked in her own blood.

"Are you okay?" I shot my head up and saw the voice.

The youngest apprentice sat watching me with slightly scared, but interested eyes.

Sighing I shook my head "I'm alright, but just worried"

"Why" He cocked his head so that it tilted.

"It's almost leaf-bare, leaf-bare always brings death" I growled, not at him, but at the fact that indeed leaf-bare will bring death.

"What are you doing out here alone?" I asked to change the subject.

He shuffled his paws "I lost the rest of the border patrol" he mumbled.

I shook my head and tossed him the mouse I had caught.

Lifting my nose I smelt for the patrol.

"That way, tell them you smelt a mouse so you wanted to catch it for the clan, make sure you apologize." I went back to my catch and dug it up.

Nodding his thanks he shot off in the direction of the patrol.

As I walked back to Shadowclan camp I began to plan it, it would be easy to kill that pathetic piece of fox-dung, claim I tried to save her, comfort _my_ mate and then maybe he would see I'm the only one for him and move to Shadowclan.

It was a perfect plan, I'd just have to set it up right.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~OoO~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I watched as my mate and the little-mate-stealer played together.

I had previously told him that I wanted to meet her, to which he got nervous, but agreed saying that everything between the two was fake.

So I sat.

Right at the border as they drew closer.

The Thunderpath only inches in front of my nose.

"You're here." I tried to contain the jealousy, and cruelty, but it still shown in my voice.

The little she-cat didn't notice it, or acted like she didn't at least and purred.

"Who's this?" She asked.

"A friend" He ducked his head in embarrassment and I flexed my claws.

"Could you get a mouse, I'm quite hungry, I didn't have time to eat." I lied watching the sun slowly sink.

He hesitated but nodded pressing his nose to her ear, making me sick.

"Come here, I'd like to get a better look at you.. Make sure you're worthy of my.. _friend_" I stood up, looked both ways, nothing just a very distant rumble, and crossed the Thunderpath.

She walked up to me, slightly nervous and then stood tall.

I began to sniff her over, she was the perfect she-cat, however she wasn't perfect for my mate.

I was.

Growling I struck out my paw and swatted hers, causing her to fall into a heap of fur.

Satisfaction ran through me as I realized that I could easily over power the tiny frame of the Thunderclan she-cat.

Planting my paws on the back of her neck I extended my claws so that they gripped her scruff.

I was going to kill her, right now, as the sky just began to turn black like the Thunderpath they stood on.

"He's _mine _and you are just a distraction to our love, he never loved you! He loved me, and he was just using you. He'll never be yours. He'll always be mine, and I'll make him love me if I need to." I hissed into her ears.

She shook under me and I flipped her over easily.

Oh how I could rip her apart so easily, but sadly I had to make it look like a monster did it.

_A monster will do it, either way_ Something said inside of me _Are you calling me a monster?_ I asked.

No reply.

Growling I looked into her sky blue eyes and thought about how I could make it most believable.

I grabbed her scruff and stood her up.

She looked weak, scared, and pathetic.

Shaking my head I bat a strong blow at her head, causing her to stumbled.

Reminding myself constantly to keep my claws sheathed I struck again, and again, and again, until eventually she landed on the hard black Thunderpath with a thud.

I looked at her, sprawled out on her side and placed a firm paw on her ribs.

Causing such a force of hate, rage, and jealousy I heard the brittle bones snap beneath my paws.

"No!" I heard a yowl behind me and I turned to _my _mate.

I purred "Isn't this fantastic? Now it can be just you and me! She'll never come between us again!" I said happily, but his grief-strucken face never changed.

He ran to the small silver she-cat and picked her up by the scruff and carried her to the Thunderclan border.

"How could you" He sobbed, pressing his nose into her fur.

"It had to be done" I whispered, why wasn't he happy?

Now we could be together.

"No, it didn't, I never loved you, it was always her I loved! I just didn't want to hurt you" He cried.

"What" I recoiled in shock, the rumbling in my ears, which I mistook for the sky, was getting louder.

I shook my head "You're lying!" I yowled in disbelief.

He remained crouched over her pathetic body, and so I did what came by instinct.

Crouching low I hissed "We could be together!" I said once more.

Preparing to leap I felt a warm feeling on my side, my entire body shook, and I turned my head to see bright blinding lights of a red monsters eyes stared into mine, until a sickening thud hit me.

My legs flailed and I was tossed into Thunderclan territory.

I felt my bones slowly collapse as I tried to breathe.

"Help me" I cried spitting up blood.

"You can't make me love you, but do know I always be your friend. I never lied I liked you, I do, but just not that way. I'm sorry" He sputtered rushing to my broken body.

A sob got stuck in my throat "Don't be" I whispered finally seeing the fault in my ways, what a fox-brained fool was I?

"Goodbye" He mumbled.

I slightly raised my head in attempt to lick his cheek "Goodbye, my love."

"This is it, I guess" He commented looking up at the darkened sky, beautiful sight, and soon I'd be part of it.

"This is it" I echoed and took my very last breath.

**I just draaaagggged this one on and on, didn't I? I just couldn't kill her, noo, I had to give a story.**

**These are getting longer and longer and longer each time (This one is exactly 1,400 words!)**

**Thanks for reading,**

**Kat!**


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